Turning the pages

Kokology- turning the pages

Here's another Japanese projective test called Kokology.

Imagine you get a new magazine… how do you go through the features?

· Read the magazine in order from first page to last

· Jump to the articles that you know will interest you and read only those

· Flip through the pages and read anything that seems interesting

· You read the features in the same order that you always do

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Your choice reflects many choices but how you budget your time relates to how you handle resources – specifically your money and about your personality.

Read the magazine from page one to last: You are the type of person who knows every penny and where each $ is spent. You know this because you like to know where you stand and like to have things in order and as they ”should be.” You are someone who likes to have things organized, in place and predictable

Jump to the articles that interest you: Money burns a hole in your pocket and if you have a yearning for something you go for it. You are a free-spirit and love to be spontaneous even if there is a risk.

Flip through the pages and read what is worthwhile: You are economical. You don’t spend your money frivolously or waste your resources. You are conservative, cautious and watchful.

You read the magazine in the same order as you always do: You spend according to habit regardless of the changes in your life. If you won the lottery, you would still probably shop in the same discount stores—you are a creature of habit. You tend to do things in the same way you always did despite changes in your life… this could create difficulties because you have a hard time letting go of things that really need to be released.

Did it fit for you?

Kokology- Clear Blue Skies

Here's another example of Kokology, a Japanese projective test that tells you a little about some of your hidden gifts.

This one is called "Clear Blue Skies."

Imagine a clear blue sky tonight, without a cloud to be found. Imagine what is below your clear blue sky and pick the landscape that is the most calming and relaxing for you.
* A snowy expanse
* A blue seascape
* A green mountain
* A field of yellow flowers

Which one did you chose?

* A snowy expanse: You have a special sensitivity that lets you see complex situations in a glance and determine the root of the concerns. You have what it takes to be a great decision-maker and you are a visionary. Trust your intuition and that will guide you well
* A blue seascape: You have a natural talent for relationships and people respect your ability to communicate as you bring people together. You help others work together smoothly and you are an invaluable part of a team. When you compliment people it means the world to them
* A green mountain: Your gift is expressive communication. You always seem to be able to understand how people feel and you can help them articulate how they feel. You always seem to be able to help others find their way.
* A field of yellow flowers: You are a storehouse of knowledge and creativity and you are always bursting with ideas. You never stop working on your dreams and there is nothing you can't achieve.
So did these fit for you? Remember, there is something wonderful in each of you, if you will just look inside and see what's inside.

Are you a cat or a dog?

Are you a dog or a cat?

Last year we looked at a study which was done at the University of Texas identifying if people are cat people or dog people. Our segment looked at some of the characteristics of why people choose their favorite pet. Our segment was one of the highest viewed online and tonight we will look at some other ways to define a cat person and a dog person.

Tell us a little bit about the basic characteristics of dog vs. cat people

· Cat people are seen as more independent

· Cat people are seen as more neurotic, creative, philosophical and non-traditional

· Dog people are seen as more friendly

· Dog people are seen as agreeable, social, and more extraverted

So what else do we know about the differences about pet ownership and pet personalities?

· More people hate cats than those who hate dogs

· Our relationship with dogs throughout history has been different than it has with cats. Cats are seen as more solitary creatures (as are their owners) and Dogs are seen as more pack like and social

· Dogs intrude on people’s activities and feel lonely and want to play while cats are more invisible. Cats will abandon play and leave and dogs typically will engage in play until the owner gives up. This relates to the personality traits of socialization, extraversion, interactions to cat and dog lovers.

· Dog owners tend to be those who also would have a cat as well, but cat owners are more likely to only live with a cat (once again showing the socialization style and friendly nature of dog owners

· Cat people tend to live alone and twice as likely to live in an apartment. In contrast, dog people tend to have children and live in a house. Single women are the most likely to have a cat, and grew up in a house having a cat.

· Cat people score low in dominance personality which relates to those who are forceful, assertive, and self-confident. Dog people score high in dominance. Cat people however are trusting, straight-forward and get along people

·

What are some suggestions that relates to pet lovers and our mental health?

· Flexibility is important. You may never choose to have a different pet, but just like with people around you…. Look for their positives and see their strengths.

· Be grateful. Remember what pets offer to us—unconditional love, acceptance and friendship. But, don’t forget that those around us can give us some of the same offerings.

· Health and well-being. Statistics show that those who have pets tend to live longer, take better care of their physical and mental health and have less medical conditions. So consider the benefits and perhaps you’ll be hugging your pet and thanking them for what they give you, or going out and purchasing a pet in 2012.

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De-Stress Your Life

De-stress your life

Can stress really be good for us?

· Stress – eustress is actually something that can be a motivator. It can get us moving and push us to peak performance.

· People who experience “good” stress have increased blood flow and our muscles and limbs meet the challenge. The perfect example of “good” stress on a body is aerobic exercise.

· “Good” stress tends to push us to meet mental challenges, be creative and can create opportunities for us to exceed our normal functioning at rest.

What does bad stress do to us?

· Physical: It constricts our blood vessels, it raises our blood pressure and we tend to feel dizzy

· Reactions: Many people have lapses in judgement, make poor choices, raise their voices & feel angry, feel cold in their extremities as blood flows to other parts of their body

· Mental: Creates heightened anxiety that tends to create ruminating thoughts, thoughts of horror & fear, and the inability to concentrate.

What are some techniques for calming our stress levels?

· In a 2011 study 62% of people reported that changing their thoughts made a difference. The key was changing thoughts and focusing on the positive. Self-talk and reframing the situation into a “can-do” statement is powerful

· Evaluating the situation. 56% of those who were aware and acknowledged their stressor found that it reduced the stress level. When we ignore symptoms our body builds up the stressors and it can be destructive to our physical and mental health

· Knowing your weaknesses. 52% of the study noted that just knowing what stressed them out was helpful to avoid concerns.

· Recharge: 38% of the respondents said that focusing on recharging was helpful to lowering stress. Recharging included doing things such as exercise, relaxing, or doing something fun.

· Therapy can teach you Proven techniques: Techniques such as meditation, deep breathing exercises and learning techniques of biofeedback have proven to be exceptional methods for lowering stress. These techniques can be learned in therapy and become useful ways to lower stress whenever and wherever it is experienced.

Request or Demand

Requests—Many people have them, but how many people are comfortable asking for what they want? It’s not easy to ask, but some people are very good at making requests and tonight we will help you become comfortable with “the ask.”

What are some of the common things that keep us from asking for what we want?

· Fear: Many people don’t ask for what they need or what because it makes them feel vulnerable, exposed, and risk being rejected. Many people say they feel insecure, inadequate and feel a loss of control when they make a request.

· Old patterns: Many people feel uncomfortable asking for their needs because they have been told it is not okay to ask, or perhaps they were told that they were undeserving, or for many they believe there will be negative effects of asking for needs. Some people feel they can’t ask for their needs because it is demanding something that they don’t deserve.

· Unclear desires: Many people have difficulty asking for what they need because they are unclear on the specifics of what they really want. When you make vague requests people are uncertain what you really want or need.

· Destructive thoughts: Many people don’t ask for their needs because they create destructive thought patterns in their heads that limit their ability to ask. Some it is self-centered to ask for your needs, or that people should know what you want without asking. Others assume that someone would say “no” so why even ask, while others don’t want to feel needy or appear weak.

You mentioned some people confuse demands with requests. What is the difference between demands and requests?

· Request: There is an understanding that with a request a person has a right to choose to say “Yes” or “No”. With a request there is the understanding that there is no fear, shame or guilt involved no matter what the answer

· Demand: A demand implies there is a threat or that something negative will happen in some form of retribution.

· In fact the key word is FREE… a request is where someone feels free to ask no matter what the answer vs. demand that holds no freedom on ransom.

What are the elements of an effective request?

· Know what you want before you ask. Make sure your want is consistent with what you really say. For instance. If you want someone to help you with a task be certain you know what you want from them and what you need

· Be specific. If you want help with a task, be sure you are specific about the specifics about the task. Break it down and tell them exactly what you’d like and when you would like help.

· Remember if it is a request, the person may say no and it is important that you have a back up plan or strategy

· You have a right to make a request. Remember that if you receive a NO… the message is about the sender and not about you.